*
“‘Ceterum autem censeo Carthaginem esse delendam’ (English: “Furthermore, I take into consideration that Carthage must be destroyed”) is a Latin oratorical phrase which to be in well-known use in the roman inn Republic in the second Century BC during the latter years of the Punic Wars versus Carthage. The phrase was most famously uttered frequently and persistently practically to the allude of absurdity by the roman inn senator Cato the Elder (234-149 BC), as a component of his speeches.”

“Oh, gods, girlfriend didn’t invite Cato tonight, did you?”

“I — I invited everyone in the Senate –”

“Uuuuuuuuuughhh.”

“What is it? What’s wrong? What go I do wrong?”

“Nothing, if you want to organize a Carthage-destroying class tonight. But if you want to throw a satisfied dinner party, you know, everything.”

“He’s still on that kick?”

“Still top top that…Listen, Lavinia the Hostess, yesterday ns ran right into Cato external of the Villa Publica — the Villa Publica, mental you, not the Curia Hostilia, and I do the efforts to have actually a conversation through him, and also do you recognize what he said to me instead of speak ‘goodbye’ or ‘take care’ or ‘give my love come the tiny ones’?”

“What?”

“He claimed ‘Carthage need to be destroyed.’ similar to that. Choose he’s on the floor the the Senate. That’s what that says instead of goodbye now.”

“No.”

“Swear it.”

“I can’t believe it.”

“And the worst part is, he’s preaching to the choir. It’s…look, of course, in theory ns agree the Carthage need to be destroyed. And also we will destroy it, us absolutely will. But there room so plenty of other areas to damage right now. We have actually to ruin Macedonia, we have to damage Philip of the Nine gold Armies, we have actually to destroy Tyre and Sidon, we have actually to ruin the bearded men of the north…we can’t fall everything and go destroy Carthage right currently just because it’s Cato’s pet project.”

“Of course.”

“And frankly, in the meantime, it’s an ext than a little rude of him. Need to the niceties no longer be it was observed just since Carthage quiet has human being living in it? would certainly it kill him to simply say ‘goodbye’ at the finish of a conversation?”

“I kn — oh, shut up, shut up, he’s here. I’m sorry. Yet be nice. Be nice.”

“I’m constantly nice.”

“Not your version of nice. What other people mean when they speak nice.”

“Uuuuughhh.”

Things had actually gone well, if a little stiffly, in ~ first. At one suggest Marcellus the Awful mentioned a partridge hunt he’d recently been on and also Cato’s eyes gleamed before he realized he’d misheard him.

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But Autilius the Sailor had actually only the week reverted from a four-year expedition to the islands of the Sun, and innocently remarked top top the towers of Carthage throughout his return voyage. Lavinia the Hostess might have poisoned him.

“Carthage, you say?” Cato claimed blandly, and also she knew in her heart the night to be ruined. But they didn’t call her Lavinia the Hostess because that nothing.

Turning to the guy on she left, Lavinia request (loudly, brightly, determinedly), “Pliny, i hear you’ve found a new kind that hedgehog. The must have actually been fascinating.”

Pliny swallowed, nodding excitedly. “I have actually — i was wade in my garden as soon as –”

“The thing about Carthage,” Cato said, “is that it need to be destroyed.”

Julia the Snob pursed she lips in amazement, and also Lavinia the Hostess knew she could kiss the planning committee goodbye this year.

“Is this a new kind that cheese?” Marcellus asked Lavinia, gamely trying to stem the tide, and she might have kissed him.

“The thing. Around Carthage. Is that it need to be destroyed. Us sit right here feasting like victorious warriors while Carthage stands, also now, she proud towers clearly shows from the sea!”

Yes, the course, Lavinia assumed desperately, but life has to go top top — 

Cato ordered the salt cellar from the center of the table. “Imagine this is the fleet the the Phoenicians,” he instructed the girl come his left. The poured his goblet the wine throughout Lavinia’s best tablecloth. “And this is the wine-dark sea. Now, Carthage is end here” — he scattered the bones native his plate and began come fashion a crude collection of towers out of them.

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Lavinia drank the rest of she goblet in one continual gulp, then motioned to the serving-Gaul because that more. It to be going to it is in a long night.